A not so great China day

Hello, my people. I hope you all are having a blessed week! Today was probably the roughest day I've had here so far. I was so tired and little issues sort of piled up really fast today.

I couldn't sleep very well last night and then I was woken at 5 a.m. because my roommate got up at that time. But then I was okay as I went to school at 7:30. This morning I taught two classes in a row-- meaning I had to shout for about 4 hours straight. I was exhausted and it doesn't help that I already have a sore throat to begin with.

The first class was okay and then my Business English class wasn't too great. Their English level is the lowest of all my classes and it is a struggle to get all 55 of them to pay attention or interact. Several students were talking so loudly in Chinese and kept playing with each other's hair or pushing each other. I finally separated a few of them and had them sit closer to the front of the class. For the rest of the class I had many of them share out loud with the class about things we had discussed. Since it is an oral English class, it is our goal to have them speak as much as possible and to practice. With this class it is rather like pulling teeth. I found myself constantly lifting up my thoughts to the father, asking for a much bigger supply of patience and love than I had in me.

Things were okay until I took off my jacket during class-- sin of all sins in Chinese culture, I found out later. The morning started out very chilly and then it was blazing hot soon after. I was wearing a nice khaki jacket over a nice black shirt. So during class I took off my jacket and set it on the podium. I heard a collective gasp. I realized I had committed some kind of faux pas, but I wasn't sure what. I looked down at my clothes and everything was okay to me, so I didn't know what I had done. Later I told my team and everyone looked at me with sort of a disappointed look or something. I wasn't sure what. Apparently taking off your jacket means you are stripping. Oh, okay. I guess I had missed that memo. So that class probably thought I was a scandal.

Then after class one girl came up to me and said to me she thinks I should be more "positive." I couldn't really understand what else she said, but it was something like it was harsh of me to ask people to talk so much when they didn't want to. I just nodded and told her thanks for her suggestion. I just want them to learn and practice their English. This is their major and they've already studied it for 9 years previously. It is difficult to express that practicing out loud as often as possible is going to help them improve so much. Later it will also help them to get good jobs...

After that class I found it sort of hard not to cry. I had to continue to lift my thought up and I had to tell myself that it is okay to make mistakes. I can't be perfect, especially if I've never been a teacher before.

The rest of the afternoon I spent writing lesson plans in my office. I also tried going to the post office to mail some letters, but they don't mail anything to America. I have to go downtown.

We got back to the old campus at about 5:20. Jodi and I went to the noodle shop out the back gate and had a good dinner. Then we went to buy some bananas. I caused another ruckus that I didn't mean to cause. I was going to buy 3 little beat-up bananas from a street vendor. He wanted to charge 3 kuai, which was twice what I knew they charged Chinese people. So I tried to barter in my limited Chinese. I offered 2 kuai, thinking he would settle for maybe 2.5 kuai. But instead he got very angry and ended up running into these huge bamboo stalks that the vendor next to him had stacked. They collapsed all over and landed mostly on a bicycle. Then he got even more angry and threw the bananas back on his cart. I wanted to melt away. I didn't end up with any bananas. I don't think he would have given them to me now even if I wanted them for 3 kuai.

So I'm back in my room. I talked to some of my teammates and I read the word for a long time. I feel a little better. A good night's sleep will probably be the best. Could you please think of me and especially the difficult class I have? Please think of all 55 of those Business English students. I really need renewed strength and patience. I'm sorry I had to share all these things. I wasn't going to, but then I realized that perhaps it was good for you to know not only the joys and good times I'm experiencing here, but also the difficulties.