Being a Celebrity

Recently some friends from our organization who teach in northern China wrote an amazing song called, "Celebrity." It was so funny, because it was so true. Coming to China as a white foreigner means you're an instant celebrity. Everyone wants to take your picture, say "hello," and practice their English with you just about every second of the day. I would have thought I had adjusted to this life by now, but it is still one of the most amusing and challenging aspects of living here.

No matter how much I want to blend in and be "Chinese," I can't. I am and will always be the "laowai" (old outsider), "waigoren" (foreigner), or "waijiao" (foreign teacher). I hear people calling me those three different versions at least several times every day. Everyone stares at me and the other foreign teachers on our team. The whiter and taller you are, and lighter eyes you have, the more stares you attract. So I win! :)

Being a foreigner in China can afford you lots of privileges. If I wanted, I could get away with most anything, because I can claim I don't understand or I'm not Chinese. Anything I do, no matter how lame, is thought of as amazing and talented by everybody. And in China I'm considered pretty beautiful. ;)

But it also has disadvantages. I'd love for people to talk to me not because I'm a strange-looking person, but because I'm a cool and interesting person on the inside. I'd love to be able to walk outside without people shouting at me. I'd love to go shopping without attracting crowds of onlookers. I'd love to cross the street without causing traffic to nearly careen off the side of the road. I'd love to walk around without people literally stopping in their tracks to gape.

Sometimes it starts to wear on me. When they holler, "Laowai! Laowai!" (Outsider!) I want to respond, "Ni shi laowai!" (You're an outsider!) Or I want to stare right back at them until they look away. Or I want to say, "Yes, I can understand what you're saying in Chinese about me!" Sometimes I have actually said or done these things, but usually the Father reminds me to respond with love and graciousness.

The other day I was having a particularly severe case of feeling like I was in a zoo being examined, and started thinking rather bitter thoughts in my head. But then the Father sent an albino my way. There is an albino on my campus and he crossed my path right then and there. He can never blend in anywhere, yet he isn't moping around. It was very humbling.

Several hours later, the same bitter thoughts began again as people snapped pictures of me outside. But then the Father sent a one-legged student my way. He also doesn't fit in with the rest of Chinese society, but he doesn't complain. Again, it was quite humbling!

I think being a foreigner in China is so much more unique than being a foreigner in every other country in the world. China, with its population of 1.4 billion people, was literally sealed off from the rest of the world until just the last 30 years. It is also certainly not a place for many immigrants, so non-Chinese stand out. It's not even close to being a melting pot like America or many other countries.

And where I live is not even close to being a tourist attraction. The only few other foreigners you see here once in a great while are usually older European couples adopting a poor Chinese baby. Many of the students at our school are from the villages in this province and have never seen a foreigner until they set eyes on us. No wonder they look a little shocked. Sometimes I wished they didn't look quite so shocked. Even children are often afraid of us.

Well, that is a little snapshot of what it is like to be a foreigner in inland China. Maybe it will be different soon as China continues to develop and open up to the rest of the world. For now, it is just a daily struggle for me to stop thinking about how I'm a reluctant celebrity. People are going to still be fascinated with my exotic self, so I need to just try to reflect His light. I want people to look at me not because of the glow of my white skin, but from the glow of His light shining through me in a dark place.