Epicenter

Each time I want to write a blog post, I get sidetracked or give up.  There are either too many or not enough words in my head.  I am trying to stay engaged, while learning how to work and live in such a brand new place with brand new people.  That means there are plenty of ups and downs.

Someone remarked that Oakland has a split personality, which seems to desribe this city quite well.  It can be the most frustrating and remarkable city filled with the most frustrating and remarkable people.  Oakland is a city of paradoxes and cannot fit in to any box, which I really want to do.  Why, Oakland?  Why are you the way you are?  In addition, to having a split personality, Oakland has physical and cultural earthquakes.  From what I've gathered, Oakland and the Bay Area seem to be at the epicenter in issues of race, poverty, and religion... the effects radiate out to the other parts of California and the country.   

Oakland has been voted as the 3rd unfriendliest place in the world--just behind Newark and Islamabad apparently.  It is indeed an unfriendly place--people are stressed, densely packed in, and from so many different cultures and backgrounds that don't really trust each other.  But I've also met some incredibly kind strangers, neighbors, and new friends in unexpected ways who are welcoming even to this foreign Midwesterner.  Sure, people may look at me with wariness or even angry glares when I say "good morning" in the elevator, but at least you don't have to worry about small talk or millions of people asking, "How are you?" when they probably don't really care.  And sure, a man snickered when I mistakenly said "howdy," instead of "hello," but it helps build my character knowing that only God's viewpoint really matters.  I've also noticed that people are the friendliest on the hiking trails and out in nature.    

Oakland is an impoverished place, especially due to generational poverty and low education levels among most of the native Oaklanders.  There are homeless individuals on nearly every street corner, with countless people walking around very nearly in rags.  However, at the same time, you also see overwhelming displays of wealth in the form of multi-million dollar mansions, luxury cars, and designer clothes.  (In case you were wondering, I don't fit into either category).  Many parts of the city are filled with unbelievable urban blight and graffiti (in our meetings, we ponder how someone managed to tag a building with spray paint on the side of the ancient Sears building, a few stories up), but then there are also parks filled with some of the most gorgeous scenery I've ever seen.  It is filled with racial tension (mostly black-white), but the diversity is also one of its strong points. A small house church I've been going to has recently helped plant churches for Nepali and Bhutanese refugees, which are some of the most difficult countries in the world to evangelize.  Yet, here they are walking among us!  And I can enjoy food from nearly every nation on the planet within a five block radius downtown.  

In regard to violent crime, most of those descriptions are unfortunately true.  Last Friday afternoon during work just down the corner from our office, two men were engaged in a shootout in broad daylight in front of the Marriott Hotel (and only 2 blocks from the police station!).  A bystander was injured, and police were unable to respond to the scene or find the guys, because they're so understaffed.  Many of the nicer neighborhoods hire private security to patrol their streets, while the Chase bank I've been to encases its tellers in two-inch thick, bullet-proof glass.  It all sort of boggles your mind.  Oakland has one police officer for every 638 residents, while even other notorious cities like Detroit have one officer to every 235 residents.  The U.S. Department of Justice just announced a grant to help Oakland hire 10 more officers to help fill the gap in the additional 300 officers the police department needs.  I've lived in urban areas with their share of crime, but Oakland takes it to a new level.  It's definitely a different world here--like the Wild West, 21st century re-mix.

Overall, life has been a little difficult lately.  It's hard to envision how I can build a life here--it's so expensive, crowded, and a little lonely.  I'm meeting lots of people, but nobody yet really knows who I am or where I've been.  I don't really know anyone or where they've been.  People tell me not to be out after dark as a female or because my skin is white.  Why do I feel drawn to crazy places like Norfolk, Nanchang, and now Oakland?  Why couldn't I be content in sleepy, safe Indiana?  How can one place make me so happy, sad, angry, and hopeful?  I don't understand and don't think I'm necessarily supposed to understand... I think it will just take time for this place to become home. 

Like always, I thrive in challenging places and situations.  I get to remember my street smarts, relationship-building skills, and ability to adapt-- all characteristics that I have allowed to get rusty.  I have a great job, a safe place to live, and food in my stomach.  Life will be hard for a while or maybe forever, but I am a child of God, and there is a reason I beat out all those other competitors for this job that brought me here.  I really enjoy my job, co-workers, outdoorsy opportunities, dining options, and sunshine.  Please pray that I will find a fellowship to call home--that is proving to be one of the most difficult parts of this transition.  And please pray that I will have plenty of love and grace for the people around me.           

My prayer for Oakland is:

"You hear, O Lord, the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry, defending the fatherless and the oppressed, in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more."  Psalm 10:16-18.

 Checking out the new and old Bay Bridge with new friends.

Hiking at the Redwood Regional Park with my neighbors.

 Can you spell f-o-g?