Wish list

Before I started to write this blog, I sort of sat and stared at an advertisement at the top of my computer screen. It says "Memorial Day Sale" at Ace, the helpful place. Do I even remember what a hardware store is? I'm picturing the one at home. It always was sort of a comfortable place to go, usually with Mom. We'd get mulch, or paintbrushes, or light switch plate covers, or a room heater, or a hose. Everyone wore little red vests who worked there, and many of the customers wore coveralls or jeans and outdated shirts. And everyone spoke in that Kansas way of talking, and nobody ever seemed in a hurry.

Now why am I getting sentimental about Ace Hardware of all places? I'm sure when I eventually do see it again, I won't really care. But then it makes me start thinking of America in general. America seems like this very distant place that might or might not actually exist. I hear about it in the news, or from my students, or from my family through Skype. And now that I'll be back in America in just a little over a month, once and a while I think about what it's like there.

Anyway, I also sometimes think of America when I trek across the city to Metro, the German foreign goods store, about every four or five weeks. I usually don't get a whole lot--maybe some spaghetti sauce, salad dressing, raisins, or peanut butter. When I went recently, I splurged and bought a box of blueberry muffin mix. Yummmmmm...

So today I finally got around to making the mix after trying to collect the ingredients needed to bake it. I bought some eggs from the lady and her vegetable cart on the corner alley. I bought a little baggy of milk from a cardboard box in the tiny school store. And I had to put fish oil in place of vegetable oil, which doesn't exist, or is too difficult to find. A muffin tin doesn't fit in the toaster oven (real ovens are rare), so I made blueberry bread. Sometimes cooking food is more effort than it's worth, but this time I think it was worth it. :)

And I'm going to write about other things I'm looking forward to this July in America. I'm super excited to go to the gym (it is culturally unacceptable for girls to "work out" here), I will be even more excited to see shoes and clothes in my size and length (everything is made for tiny fairies here), I'm going to run and sit in the grass (if you find any grass here, usually it is more dirt than grass and other people are most likely sitting on it), I want to drink water out of the tap and not have to boil it (like most other countries in the world, you can't swallow the water from the faucet in China), I can't wait to chuck toilet paper down the toilet (if you throw paper into the toilets in China, it's a mini-disaster), I want to dry my clothes in a dryer (instead of line drying everything), I want to stand in a bathtub (instead of taking a shower in a "shoilet," which is taking a shower over the toilet), I think it might be nice to have some fresh food (instead of MSG, oil-saturated dishes), I can't wait to see the blue Kansas sky (you can't see the sky most days because of the buildings or clouds or pollution here), I can't wait to fully understand what people are talking about, I will be glad to really say or write what's on my mind, it will be nice to not be a celebrity for a couple months, and I can't wait to see and hug my family after so many months!!

Thanks for letting me share. It wasn't meant to be a complaint list; I think it was been good for me to live more like 90 percent of the world lives since September. And I have realized that America really is an exception. I'm just looking forward to a little rest.

Time to for me to go to English corner/everyone-talk-to-the-foreign-teachers-at-once place. See you next time!

Back in the blog business

Hi, friends and readers. I don't know where I've been. I've just been teaching and living and loving, like usual. And all of a sudden the end is looming on the horizon. Well, thankfully it's not really the end, but changes are coming.

My teammates and I are rushing to prepare our final exams for next week. Actually I'm not really rushing, but quietly and steadily preparing. Ever since I got to China, I sort of take things in little steps. I try not to make many plans (they'll change again, anyway), I don't have many ambitions at the moment (well, at least not beyond teaching and being with students and teammates), and I kind of just let the Big Guy do all the work.

It is a very strange feeling, because most of my life I've been planning, scheming, and striving. Now I just put one foot in front of the other, in a very contented sort of way. And you never, ever know what is around the corner here. But it's not scary or worrisome. At least I have never woken up even one day feeling bored or purposeless.

Now that I've been philosophical for a bit, I'll talk about some other news. The past couple of days we've been talking about "fears" and what we're afraid of in class. They are fearful of many things most people are afraid of: not getting a good job, never getting married, getting sick, losing a family member, etc. But there also are some fears thrown in there that I don't usually even consider. "Losing face" is huge in Chinese culture, which many of them mentioned. One boy seriously said that if he lost face he might as well die. Other students said how their biggest fears were realized when they failed the college entrance exam and had to come to this university. It was either attend this university or work in a factory. To many students both of those options seem nearly equally pointless.

After everyone was thoroughly depressed (well, not really), I asked them, "Okay, we've talked about things we are afraid of. Now how do you cope with your fears?" "Cope" was a new vocabulary word for the day. Many of them talked about listening to music, talking to their friends or parents, taking a walk, sleeping, or making themselves think positive thoughts. One class, which is the eternally curious class (and my favorite), then asked me, "How do you cope, Miss Laura?"

Well, dear little students, let me tell you. So I told them how naturally I'm a very scared person. I get scared of spiders, people, elevators, the future, etc. etc. I said that I sometimes take a walk or try to think positive thoughts also, in order to cope. But, I explained, the thing that helps me the absolute most is [thinking] to Him. This helps me the most--from little fears and decisions to big fear and decisions.

Later I told them that we should hang out in June, because I'll be at the university for another whole month, without teaching responsibilities. So I think my students and I will be planning many activities. Then I finally broke the news to them that I'm returning to this university next year. They started applauding like crazy. Oh, dear freshmen, nobody can replace your enthusiasm and innocence.

One of my Chinese friends today told me that there are now 2 cases of swine flu in this province. I'm not very alarmed, just like nothing really surprises me anymore. It's just not a good sign, I'm thinking, because now that flu will probably spread in about five minutes to 100,000 people. Soap and warm water are literally not used here. This country is quarantining people who arrive on international airplanes with no signs of the flu, but nobody is told that it is vital to at least wash your hands with soap and warm water. Basic prevention and hygiene is key.

But enough of my cynicism! It's time for me to get some dinner. Bye for now!